Southshore is Dog
Heaven (WITH RULES)
Those
who keep and care for four-legged friends here know that this place is a
virtual canine Valhalla. Trails, lawns, ponds, a doggie park, and countless
waste bins adorned with the oh-so-necessary
poopie plastic baggies.
Yet,
there is a constant oopsie as folks bounce through this bucolic paradise with
their beasts. WHERE’S THE LEASH?
There
are countless reasons for this Southshore sanction. I offer you three:
Coyote Cafeteria
Our
original residents are tame, calm, not interested in humans (I can sometimes
relate), and effective-efficient garbage disposals. Face it. You don’t see
carrion, carcasses, or a flood of carrot-eating bunnies. Aside from the crap
that they love to deposit on the streets and sidewalks (who knows why), our
Wiley Wild Bunch are great hosts.
Remember:
We invaded their turf, not vice versa.
However,
even the most docile wild dog will dash after a four-legged fur ball,
especially a small one. Your off-leash frolicking Fido makes for great fast
food. Trust me, Wiley is faster.
Owner
You ate my dog.
Wiley
Looked like a rabbit
to me.
Owner
That was my dog. My
baby.
Wiley
Dog. Rabbit. Baby.
They all taste like chicken (burp). Excuse me. Gotta make a deposit on the sidewalk.
Bow-Wow Blitzkrieg
Predator
or prey? Ambusher or victim? Deranged dog or docile potential dinner? No one
can predict when a cuddly companion will morph in Kujo.
Police Officer
Your pet was the
aggressor?
Owner
My Fluffy never did
this before.
Police Officer
Was the dog
off-leash?
Owner
She always stays
close to me and minds my commands. I thought it would be fine.
Police Officer
What do you think
now? And, speaking of fines…
Hook the Shot-Hit the
Hound (Or Husband)
( Southshore Course
is a separate entity. Got a question or a beef? Seek clarification from them.
Below is a diatribe about DANGER)
Our
world-class course has it’s rules as well. Now that the reseeding has taken
hold and the green velvet fairway has rolled out a soon-to-be-divot-disaster
welcome mat, duffers and pros alike tee off, hoping to negotiate traps, water
hazards, and that one member of the foursome who always cheats.
Gross
Great Dane Goop on the Green, Terrier Tinkle on the Tees, or Rottweiler Residue
by the Rough need not enhance the plethora of legitimate land mines already
installed.
Plus,
there is always the chance of an occasional (frequent) hook or slice. If you
are strolling around the course (a no-no) with a pet (a bigger no-no) and the critter is off-leash (hat-trick for
stupid), you are fair game for a fairway deadly drive.
So
remember pet-owners, there are plenty of play and pacing areas accessible in
Southshore ON-leash). You pet-owner buddies will share the countless parks and
runs that are a short hop away by car or even golf cart.
Owner
Time for a walk-ie?
Pet
86 the leash. Let’s
cruise.
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